mysteriousaliways: (Primeval - Sanctuary Visitor)
[personal profile] mysteriousaliways
Title: All Quiet On The Night Shift
Author: [ profile] mysteriousaliwz
Fandom: Primeval
Pairing: Gen, hints of OFC/Norman from Maintenance
Rating: U
Wordcount: 794
Author Notes: Located in the ARC, with references to Sanctuary. If you’re not familiar with Primeval Sanctuary!verse, this will make no sense whatsoever. (Masterlist here: Sanctuary Masterlist.)
From the prompt ‘The Night Shift’ given to me at the Denial weekend. Norman belongs to [ profile] fredbassett, who was kind enough to Normanify the dialogue & beta for me, despite being horrendously busy. Many thanks m'dear! (Due to technical issues, some of the edits may have been mangled in transit, so anything that seems off is solely my responsibility.)


Lena’s head appeared round the door of the office.

“Tea-break!” she announced cheerfully. “Have you finished the hoovering yet?”

Shelly blinked at the interruption.

“Um, not yet, still got to finish this room.”

“No problem, love, we can do it after. Bring the rubbish.”

Lena headed off down the corridor to the kitchen area, with Shelly trailing after her, clutching a black bin bag.

“Pop them over by the others,” Lena said, gesturing at a pile of bin bags by the doorway, “I’ll take them round the back door at the end of the shift.”

“I’ll be doing that,” said a gruff voice behind Shelly, who gave a little shriek of surprise and looked around.

“Goodness, you gave me a scare! I didn’t see you there,“ she said to the man emerging from the door marked ‘Maintenance Only’.

“Norman!” exclaimed Lena. “Such a gentleman! I didn’t know you’d be around tonight.”

The gentleman in question muttered something that sounded like ‘One o’ them diggin’ pests been at the wiring for Monty’s cage door’.

“Well the kettle’s on. Fancy a cuppa?” asked Lena.

He nodded, and gathering up the rubbish bags, carted them off down the corridor.

Lena smoothed down her nylon overalls and checked her reflection in the door of the microwave, patting her grey curls into place.

“Who was that, then?” asked Shelly. This was only her second day working at the ARC and she still hadn’t quite got over the shock.

“That’s Norman from Maintenance. He’s a lovely fella, just don’t bring up the subject of the Archbishop of Canterbury.”

Shelly opened her mouth to ask why, and then thought better of it. She was still having enough trouble getting her head around the idea that there were real, live dinosaurs wandering around the place through holes in time and that she’d been introduced to a mammoth in the basement during her meal-break yesterday. (It had liked the apple.) Adding religion into the mix was, she thought, asking for a nervous breakdown.

Lena filled the teapot and took out some mugs, handing Shelly the one with the picture of Luke Skywalker. She added three sugars to the Spice Girls mug and the ‘I ♥ Triceratops’ one, then waved the bag of sugar enquiringly at Shelly.

“Just milk in mine, thanks.”

Lena poured out the tea. Norman returned to the kitchen and pottered around at the sink.

“You’re looking very dapper tonight, Norman. Is that a new pair of socks from Dave?” asked Lena.

Shelly glanced at Norman’s ankles. The socks in question were obviously hand-knitted, and in a particularly virulent shade of yellow wool.

“Arp. ‘e liked that tea-cosy pattern you gave ‘im, e’s knitting one for you now.”

“Aw, bless him! By the way, I have that mohair & wool yarn he wanted, but they only had the primrose shade and not the buttercup, hope he doesn’t mind.” Lena rummaged in one of the cupboards and took out a carrier bag full of balls of wool.

“Thanks Lena, that’ll keep the blighter busy a wee while. ‘obnob?”

He held out an open packet of biscuits.

Lena and Shelly both took one.

“Ooh, chocolate ones! You do know how to treat a girl, Norman!”

Lena smiled coquettishly at Norman, who blushed furiously. He ducked his head, and sipped at his mug of tea, mumbling something even more incoherent than usual.

“You still all right to come round this weekend and paint the shed, Norman, love? That Moroccan Pink paint you showed me looked lovely and bright, should cheer up the garden no end.”

“Arp”, nodded Norman from behind his mug. He knocked back the last of his tea and picked up the bag of wool. “I’ll just drop this off with Dave afore I fix up the big fella’s door.”

He headed back through the door marked ‘Maintenance Only’.

“I could have sworn that was a cupboard,” remarked Shelly.

Lena looked shifty. “Well ... sort of.”

Shelly looked at her, bemused.

Norman’s voice was heard from the other side of the door, barking “Sinister! Get back in there!”

“Who’s Sinister?” asked Shelly, feeling more confused than ever. “Are you not telling me something? I’ve had to sign the Official Secrets Act to promise I won’t tell anyone about the dinosaurs or the holes in the universe, I’ve met a mammoth, been buzzed by a flying lizard and the place where I work has a bleedin’ dragon in the basement! Are there unicorns too? I mean, how much more bizarre is this place gonna get?”

They both looked at the not-exactly-a-cupboard door, and Lena patted Shelly comfortingly on the shoulder.

“I don’t think you’re quite ready to know, lovey. Let’s get back and finish the hoovering, shall we?”


Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 10:47 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Brilliant, m'dear! Bashful Norman is fab. And I adore Lena. Dave and the wool choices had me in hysterics.

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 11:13 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Thanks, sweetie :) It wasn't until the morning after that I realised I'd created a character called Lena The Cleaner. The alliteration was unintentional *g*

Norman seems to be a handy chap to have around, and evidently a fine figure of a man in Lena's opinion :)

Dave had to get his supplies from somewhere!

Lovely to see you online sweetie. Hope you're doing ok.

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 12:25 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Oh that's lovely. Bless Norman getting embarrassed. And of course Norman moonlights in Sanctuary!

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 12:34 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Lena has him wound round her little finger *g*

Sanctuary has the equivalent of Discworld's Librarian-space, that connects all the doors marked Maintenance Only. I vaguely recall this originating in a conversation with Fred :)

Norman is a busy chap *g*

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 16:27 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
This is fabulous! The Maintenance Only doors connecting the 'real' world with Sanctuary are great. And I howled at the Moroccan Pink reference. I'd forgotten I'd told you that story! Norman definitely buys in bulk and changes colour schemes when he feels like it!

I really must get an icon for him.

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 17:07 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Well, Norman has to have some way of getting between the ARC and Sanctuary, and I think he'd take a dim view of being knocked on the head every time *g*. I thought it was you who came up with the Maintenance-space concept? I'm sure I recall a conversation about it.

Norman has to finish off that job lot of Moroccan Pink somehow. Waste not, want not *g*

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 18:37 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I think I filched the idea from one of the early Tom Holt books.

That was just what Norman, and his apprentice, Victor, used to say!

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 18:59 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Glad to see I have some insight into his essential Normanness :)

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 18:26 (UTC)
fififolle: (Primeval - LMAO)
From: [personal profile] fififolle
LMAO!! That was priceless!! I nearly died when she was talking about the shed. Oh god, I need a lie down now :D Wonderful.

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 19:10 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I have the feeling that Norman negotiated a good deal for bulk-buying on that shade of Moroccan Pink. And if there are a few pots of it to spare it would be a shame to waste it *g*

Lena knows the value of a good handyman *nods*

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 19:53 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Brilliant, just brilliant. Love Norman being bashful and Dave's supply of wool and the 'Maintenance Only' access to Sanctuary.

Date: Monday, 23 September 2013 20:45 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Lena getting poor Norman all flustered with her feminine wiles *eg*

Norman is a busy chap. He gets around ;)

Date: Tuesday, 24 September 2013 09:10 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]

Brill!!!! The Secret Life of ARC Maintenance & Cleaning Staff *G*. Poor Shelly.

Glad to see Norman potentially getting a love life. Will anyone write Lena/Norman sex scenes? LOL. Knowing this place: Arp!

**Adding religion into the mix was, she thought, asking for a nervous breakdown.**

Sporfles, and I know who owns the Spice Girls mug.

Date: Tuesday, 24 September 2013 09:41 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hee! Someone has to empty the bins and clean the floors *g* Poor Shelly indeed - her new workplace is a sight weirder than she ever expected!

Lena has Norman in her sights - she knows the value of a good handyman *g*

The mug made a special guest appearance!

Date: Tuesday, 1 October 2013 19:44 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hee! I love the idea of a broom closet into Sanctuary!!! And I love the idea of Norman and Lena!

Date: Thursday, 3 October 2013 12:12 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
The Maintenance equivalent of Discworld's Librarian-space was too useful to overlook!

It was about time Norman had a potential lady friend *g*

Did you notice the cameo by your ot at leasy your household's) Luke Skywalker mug? I think Connor has borrowed it ;)

Date: Thursday, 3 October 2013 14:34 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I did wonder if it was our mug, but then thought maybe I was being egotistical.

Date: Friday, 4 October 2013 11:28 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Bashful Norman is brilliant, and I love Lena! A perfect match for him. *g*

Date: Friday, 4 October 2013 12:13 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
It was about time Norman got a lady friend :)
I can see her cooking him his tea (steak pie and veg, perhaps) while he's out painting the shed Moroccan Pink *g*


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